I Wonder

Sometimes I wonder, whether is it a necessity to love someone and to be loved.

Whether sometimes is it a must, and the vitality of longing somewhere.

Countless times I feel that I long to be loved, even despite the fact that baybe was here for the past couple of years.

Maybe I was too pampered, or I took her presence for granted.

Coz' now I wonder, how true is all this when the things you do doesn't justify anything that you say. I just couldn't come to comprehend what is going on at times.

I wonder, am I in a dream? Am I facing this reality like an absurd, ignorant vagabond?

There's no point in me saying anything now, coz' whatever it is, it isn't how it used to be.

I wonder if this is going anywhere, or we're stuck at where we started, or I wonder, did we even take a step outside of these 4 walls or not.

I hate wondering and pondering upon things, for they never lead me anywhere and tend to bring me astray.

But sometimes I just can't help myself when you do these kind of things.

It really makes me wonder, what kind of person are you?

If everything and everyone means that much to you, then what am I to you? Probably just another puppet on your wall, I wonder? Hmm.

Coz' I can never see what is going on, for you never talk to me about these things.

And even if you do, it always ends up hurting me that little more than it did the last time.

And so I wonder, how much more of this I can take.

Seriously, what or who am I to you?

I wonder, if things will change. I wonder, if maybe one day someone might actually love me as the likeliness of baybe for the past 3years. I wonder, if you would ever know how I feel when this happens one too many times.

In truthful fact, I wonder if you even read this. But I don't bother.

I just don't understand some people's actions, they can be hurtful, distorting, and even unbelievable at times.

Well, it's not easy to understand people. You may think you've known that person for your whole life, but they'll never tend to surprise you with actions you never thought could even suffice in their minds.

Those actions that hurt you so much, that you would even question their sincerity behind all those years of everything.

I wonder, how do people live these kinda lives?

I really admire them, for they can put on several masks when dealing with several people.

It's just so amazing what they can do and how they can lie to you straight in your face and come back and tell you that what he said was true.

Tsk tsk, I've been hurt uncountable times by people whom I think I could place my trust on, guess I was wrong.

But now I know that, those people are ones I cannot trust, and despite the fact of what they did to me, I still wonder am I a fool to still talk with them everyday of my life?

Despite that, I shall be the one who gives in, be the modest one and definitely not stir up any sort of unwanted attention.

For despite what all of you had done to me, I had never uttered a word to the people who eventually are gonna end up like me after they know you people long enough.

Why? Because I'm not that sadistic of a person, I don't go around screwing up people's lives and relationships like what you people did to me.

Although after what you did to me is uncomprehendable by most standards, but I feel that there's a time where you would change, all of you.

And although after what you people did to me, other people who don't know the truth behind all this come and tell me what great human beings you people are and sometimes even take pity on you all when you all put on your masks to draw attention to people.

Hypocrites, I wonder, how long can you people live this way?

Is there no feeling of guilt on what you people do everyday?

Or maybe the satisfaction of getting things done your way just defeats all other feelings within you?

I seriously wonder.

Sighs, one moment when I see you people, you're all smiling and laughing. The next when I'm talking to someone else, they tell me that you people are extremely depressed and sad.

It makes me sick to look at you people and how you infect their lives with hypocricy.

I just can't believe that you people would even resort to something this low to get someone to like you, or to get attention, or just for the sake of wanting other people to be close to you.

It's just sickening.

I wonder, do I really deserve all this kinda crap?

I wonder, why do I still associate with these bastards and bitches whom I see every single day of my friggin' life?

I wonder, will one day anyone ever know the truth behind those masks, or will I just be the only one?

But even if I am, I will never speak of it, for the more that I do, the deeper these wounds are gonna get, for there's too much hypocricy goin' around.

I wonder, how do you do things like you do now and tell someone else that you're feeling otherwise?

Baybe,

I wonder, will I ever get to see you again?

I wonder, will anyone love me like the way you did?

Sighs, I wonder, do I even deserve to be loved at all?



==================================

A Fairytale

How I'd wish I'm in a fairytale right now.

Where happy endings are always bound to happen, where everything will go your way at the end no matter what you do.

Sighs, apparently, life's nothing compared to a fairytale. Life isn't that perfect, that beautiful. Life is like a never-ending story, why? Because there is no happy endings, there is no once upon a time. It happens right now, flashing right in front of you.

At times, I wonder about the people around me, and I say to myself, am I lucky? Should I be thankful? I just don't know.

The people I want close to me, never are close to me but the people I never want close to me, will tend to want to be close to me.

It's just weird. Saddening at the same time. But heck, that's life.

When I like that someone, that someone doesn't always like me back, and when I don't really like that someone anymore, that someone will start to like me.

And when I don't really like that someone, that someone likes me, and when that someone doesn't really like me no more, I tend to like that person more than before.

Tsk tsk. I shouldn't complain and rant here. Or should I?

Well, I mean things never go the way I want them to go. Although I make the most of it, I'm never happy with the outcome of things.

Love is such an intricate thing. When you're in love, you tend to forget about everything else, sometimes even the people around you.

No idea why but it's so hard for people to love me and for me to love them back, and that is why my life is that bit much sad compared to everyone else.

I can never understand why I never fall for certain girls who get close to me, but when they stop to adhere themselves to me, I always tend to fall that little more for them.

Maybe that's why my love life sucks now. What 1 actual girlfriend since form 2? Sad right.

But maybe it's because that relationship lasted for 3years. But hey, still, it's sad.

Sigh. But when I like that girl, sometimes I just couldn't. Like the times when I was with my ex, I repelled myself from loving another girl, despite the fact that I felt that something was going on.

But even so, I managed to seperate my relationship from boy-girl friendship.

Even now, after breaking up, it's like de ja vu.

I can find girls whom I'm comfortable being with, but they'd never want to be with me, heck, actually no girl would want to be with me besides my ex.

Close friends, maybe. But girlfriend boyfriend, uggh, they'd never want to.

My lack of sensitivity and attention could be the reason why, but deep down, my heart doesn't portray what's shown and only my ex has come to know that about me. Sad. Tsk tsk.

Everyone seems to be coupled nowadays. Feels so awkward being the lamp post most of the time now, but guess I have to get used to that.

Oh yeah, I saw a rainbow today. It was beautiful but there was only half of it, but still beautiful. Oh what am I saying, ish, so unrelated.

Anyways, there are times when I just wish things would go back like to the way it was last year. Where everything seemed so simple yet perfect. I didn't had to adhere my ex for her to like me, for she liked me for who I am.

Yes, she's rich, not that popular, pretty, amiable, elegant, but most importantly, she's never a bitch and always a humble and very very selfless person. That's what I like about her, because she never, and I mean never would just leave you there all by yourself, and she checks up on you from time to time to see whether you're okay.

Yeah, I used to be on the phone quite a lot last time with her. Like 3-4 times a day and around an hour or so each time. Now, my phone seldom beeps, even when it does, I don't know, it just doesn't feel right.

Where have all the good times gone? Sighs. Is my life ever going to be a fairytale? =/



=================================

Forever and Eternity

My obstinate self just wouldn't let me think of any other name but to put this title for this post despite my brain conjuring several other titles for this post.

But FnE, could represent so many abbreviations. Feedback and Enquiry, Free and Easy, but it could also represent Forever and Eternity.

Oh, the ever sweet fragrance and scent of you passing by, just makes my heart want to adhere itself to you.

At times, your sly and cunning personality makes me wonder are you going to stick around for long or you're just gonna be gone like as quick as a nimble.

My bashful personality though begs to differ from what you may observe about my rowdiness and intricate outside. Yes, I am narcissistic and I am very conceited about myself at times, but I too have come to appreciate and admire your amiable, beautiful and eminent looks.

The agony you present to me at times was apathetic but I could not deny the fact that I myself couldn't find it in me to let you know what my heart was feeling.

Yes, I really felt that I wasn't adequate enough to adhere myself to you and it would have been rather absurd of me to do so.

I couldn't stop but loathe you, but yet, I loved you at the same time. But what I couldn't comprehend was what was going to happen if you too felt the same way. It certainly would appease me but the feeling would have been rather obscure and cold.

My inquistive and surreptitious personality made it even more hurting for me to know that you couldn't be bothered of my existence and that what I meant to you was nothing more than an insolent, negligent, obstinate, and absurd person in your life.

I knew it was difficult for me to alter the way things were made to be, but that did not hinder me nor did it halt me in my path to vanquish this concealed feeling I had for you.

I had adjourned many of my times to let you know what you mean to me, though I needed your abet, you often give me an alms which made my day much more vivid and clear than it was before. Be it in words, or just by heart, all my ambiguous feelings were gone and my feebleness was turned into robustness.

The tranquility that you bring to me, the ever so immaculate and shining incandescence that you have given to me, was the remedy that cured my ailment.

How I'd wish I could feel the same way as I did towards you before, but I couldn't. For we have moved on, the hoax and deceptions among each other, could now be indolent as we both are indolent as well.

I was never hastily in making decisions in my life, but this was something rather different and apparently, something rather unique in its own way. Thus, it wasn't in my powers to alter things as they are, but it was only in my powers and my will to just let things be as how they are made and meant to be in life.

My destitute and shallow and at times negligent knowings of love may seem to surprise you, but the fact is, I have always been that feeble in this aspect of life.

You were eminent in whatever you do and to me, you just seemed perfect and someone whom I could see myself to be with and never abdicate in the future.

But somehow, a part of me just tells me that despite your amiable and appealing appearance, it would be my misfortune and my calamity if I had chosen to be with you. For I would never know what lays ahead in this obscure and dark path.

For you are someone whom is still foreign and a mystery to me. For you are someone who can appease my heart, but at the same time shatter it into a million pieces.


"If a girl makes you suffer before you're even with her, then she's most probably not the one for you".


A quote which resembles quite a significant meaning which buries itself deep inside the grave of my heart. I'm no more than a sheer imbecile to you, a someone who you just use to appease your needs and throw away when you find that someone unneeded for.

I would have given you the world and so much more, if only I knew what you felt for me was nothing but pure and genuine love and affection without conditions, or should I say, unconditional love.

But too bad this fog of your conceited and self-imposed figure of yours has blinded me from my paths and from the vivid sky light which seized to exist at that time.

It brought me to a different path though, one less intricate and much more comprehended that the path that you forked out for me.

Yes, I'm an obstinate and absurd person in following this second path, but by all means, for choosing it will set me apart from you, then it's a path that I might come to love in the future.

But certainly, it's a lot better than being in a path I loathed for the longest time, and yet, you never knew. The only thing that could conjure in your mind when I was in that path was just nothing but sheer ridicule and an ignorant fool waiting to be disposed of.

I have...I have...Moved on.

I'm sorry for the late update for the day. Who am I talking about in that above post?

Well, actually, there's only one person who knows. Not sure if he's reading, but I'm sure he will be later on. If you are reading, you'll know who you are, and thanks for telling me to start this apathetic and ignorant war.

For it has ended now, and despite the indecisive triumph, I would gather what's left and build it up from there.


"I can't hate you anymore".



=====================================

Caught In The Middle

" If a girl makes you suffer before you're even with her, then she's not the one for you ".

To even think of the fact of being with someone that torments me before I'd even set foot on her heart is just unbearable. Sighs. The wicked and dreadful weeks I've spent since a couple of months ago has truly blinded me and place me in this place covered with the thick fog of misunderstood and unreliable feelings.

How I'd wish I could just get away from the fog and find a place to see the Sun set and rise. I have not been myself lately, although not many of you noticed much changes, but I couldn't care less about what you think anymore. The mind tells me to forget, but the heart tells me to forget about forgetting.

The never-ending journey of love that sets sail upon the river of time to the ocean of endless eternity. Oh, how I'd wish I could embark on its journey with it, but unfortunately, my companion to aid me on this journey is either long gone, or never to be found.

The companionship that some have given me, is priceless but at times, it all seems so predictable. The many faces that appear on my doorstep makes me wonder, who am I to you? That feeling of just wanting to know, and that curiosity of knowing what is unknown and foreign to me.

I look out the window, and I see the chirping sounds of the birds and I hear the buzzing sounds of the bees. It relaxes me for the moment, but when I reflect upon my life, I see nothing but a path that has been smothered with everlasting love on one side, and lies and deception on the other. Which side is this path moving towards now is yet to be known. But I do hope that I won't be caught here, in the mist of things, with my soul tormented by the very person that gives it life, lost in this universe without any navigations, and with my heart lying dead in Davy Jones' Locker.

Sighs, what in the world is wrong with you, Ken? I myself ponder upon this question. Maybe it's the fact that my feelings cannot be let known for I fear that I will lose what I've been trying so hard to find. Or maybe it's the fact that I build this wall around me where nobody can breach through it. Or maybe it's the fact that I've realized that my life's been nothing but just being a mere pillar for people to lean on for the moment, and when that time has gone, the pillar is then forgotten and never to be remembered.

" When you're gone, the words I need to hear to always get me through the day, and make it okay, I miss you...".

I hope that my decision now, will make me someone that I hope I will be in time. For I think now, it is time to forget about the things that don't mean much to me. There is no point in hoping or suffering over something that just isn't meant to be. I feel hurt, I really do, for the oblivious surrounding that I seem to be trapped in, suffocates me with the decreasing amount of room to breathe in this little globe.

I may regret over the next stone that I'm about to step on in life, but if it makes me feel any better, and certainly if it doesn't get me into another landslide, I shall make that step, for I feel that moving on and even if it means forgetting, I just have to for I do not want to be a fool nor an idiot anymore. Assume whatever you want about that, but I'm sorry, words cannot describe my apologies but I hope one day, the understanding of this situation will knock on your door and I hope then, you would understand.

If it is not meant for me to fulfill my search for my soulmate, then so be it. I would never want to get myself into a rather frustrating situation anymore, for to love, is to let love find you. One day, I hope that I won't be lost in this. One day, I hope I will find someone who will suffer with me the pain and enjoy with me the happiness and joy that life brings. One day, I hope that I will forget about the "stains on my jacket". One day, I hope that I will forget you. And one day, I hope I won't, I won't be caught in the middle anymore...

"If everything's made to be broken, I just want you to know who I am". ='(

Have You Wondered?

Okay, this goes under 'Thoughts', so therefore it is not going to be Italic. =)

Have you ever wondered?

What your life would be when you're old ?

Who will you be married with when you're let's say 27 ?

Will you even be married when you're 27 ?

Who are your friends when you're 27 ?

Do you even have friends when you're 27 ?

What will you be working as when you're 27 ?

Are you even alive when you're 27 ?


Sighs. Don't know why, but I feel as though my life is well, lifeless. =/
I somehow now tend to appreciate the simple things in life, and rather forget all the complex stuff around me, like studies and relationships. Somehow the simplicity of things just keeps me calm and peaceful.

Though it is hard to find this calmness, I tend to seek for it whenever I can. Sighs, it ain't easy to search for it, but certainly it's worth every second to savour it.

Life is too short to ponder upon the questions and problems around us. If you look at it one way, to you it may seem that one day has passed. But if you look at it the other way, it means one day less your time on Earth. =/

I don't even know what I'm typing here actually, just that I feel I've got stuff to say. Sighs, the dawn of college life falls upon me. Wish I could have loyal high school friends that'll stick it out with me till the end. They're loyal to a certain extent, but when things get messy, they bail out all the time. Sighs.

Still not a day goes by, that I stopped thinking about you. Coz' you are always on my mind, tormenting me without knowing it yourself.

I wonder, who are important to me in my life? They're here for now, but as for college life and working life, they tend to fade away with time. I just want to know, am I important to you? Who am I to you? I wonder, yes I really do wonder. Hmm...

I tend to put importance into people who don't put that importance in me. And that is the same as placing trust in the wrong people, as well as expecting too much from him/her. Sighs, it's just a matter of time I guess. But I'm already starting now, as in to see who is important to me. Hopefully I don't make mistakes coz' the deeper you get sucked into a whirlpool, the more damage it's gonna bring to you.

I wonder, when I move to Sg. Buloh, would you still want to hang out with me? Would you still even contact me? Would you still even want to call me out to yc or anything?

Sighs, words tell you one thing, but actions tell you another. Doubt any of those will happen. Baybe, how I'd wish you were here with me. Then, I'd never have to face this cold cold world alone. But you're gone now, and I have to live with that, even if it means being stuck here pondering and wondering how my life's gonna turn out.

The sweet memories that we had, will always be here in my heart, and certainly I would never forget that smile you give me everytime your eyes connect with mine. The sheer elegance and companionship that you brought me, I shall cherish no matter what. Coz' through all the tough times I've gone through, at times even when it means just being there in your arms, it feels so so comforting and reassuring.

You complete me, as simple as that. Coz' I know you do not care what other people may say about you being with me. And surely, it doesn't matter to me too. Coz' every single time, you're not afraid to show how much you care, and how much you really do want things to work out between us, even when in front of your friends, or in front of ah jie, I truly do love you for that, coz' you're never afraid to be there with me even if it means holding my hand despite me being that outcast among your friends. <3 <3 <3

Sighs. I wonder, will I ever find someone as caring as you? Will I ever? Ish, I don't know what to do. I feel insecure, incomplete, and uncared for. I may be paranoid, but hey, what's life without assurance, right? =/

I just don't know why. Sighs, now I wonder. How foolish can I be? To care for those who ain't ever gonna care for me after high school. And to ignore those who have a better possibility of sticking with me after high school. Sighs, I guess I'm a blind fool all this while. Sorry to certain people for this, it hurts I know, but it hurts me more to realize this. T_T

I wonder, is it time for me to let go? Is it time for me to move on? Is it time for me to search for someone who likes me for me? Sighs, I wonder, when will be the time.

No matter where I go, I'll always remember you, you, you, and you. All of you. Even if it seems like I don't care, I just want you to know, I'll be there for you, when the rain starts to pour. =)

I may not know much about what you people go through with life, maybe it's coz' we're not close, or maybe the level of transparency between us is rather poor, but no matter what, I will never betray the trust that you have bestowed on me unless you betrayed mine. Considering the fact of the secrets that I have kept from people over the years, though they might have forgotten me, but certainly I have not forgotten them.

Aite, that's all for this post. Nites ya'll. And don't waste your life on sleeping, coz' you'll have plenty of time to sleep when you're dead.

"Loving you is the only thing I can do, but you never noticed, you never knew...Coz' you've always just saw right through".

KeN_ ?

Edit : It's 12.30am now, so I'll post this up.

The real Ken. Who is he? What has he become into?
Gosh, I myself find it hard to answer that. But oh well, here goes. =/

Well, the real me ain't what you might think I am. I admit, yes I'm kinda like a spoiled brat. Yes, that's right. I take a lot of things for granted, and when Ken says a lot, it means a lot. As in seriously.

I don't know what is it about me that makes me think that Ken's life is so great. Is it not?
But then I ask myself, who is this Ken? Is it really that great being him?

Well, I dare say that it ain't bad being me, but it ain't easy being me too. Some of you may see Ken as this small little good for nothing rich kid, who does nothing else but care for his own welfare. I cannot change your opinion towards Ken, but all I can do is be myself and let you be the judge, coz' I am not you, Ken is not you, and Ken cannot force you to like him coz' Ken is not a materialistic and critically self-absorbed person.

It may appeal to you that Ken is rich. Yes, I know many of you think that way. But honestly, is Ken really that rich? =/

I doubt that, and yeah, I'm sure a lot of you are in disbelief and certainly would not reciprocate to what I say, but yet again, hey, who am I to make up your mind? I only can lay down some hard cold statements and yet again, you be the judge.

What about Ken keeps spending money? Why does he have so many stuff? Like those Polo shirts, that iPod Video, and that o2 XDA Atom?

You think Ken bought all of those? Well, he earned it. Yes, "earned" it. I've been a loyal son, despite being the only son, and yes, I have seldom crossed my parents and I've gained a certain amount of trust to earn what I get. Ya ya, say whatever you want. But heck, I did not spend my money on those stuff okay. Hello, even my ang pao money is kept by my parents.

So, do not assume Ken is rich. Coz' when you assume, you make an "ass" out of "u" and "me".



What about Ken's life in and out of school? Why does he seem so free and yet manage to cope with his studies during the time of need?

Well, simple. I used to put my feelings before me, as in love towards a certain someone. It inspired me to move on from whatever troubles I'm going through. That special feeling and knowing that I belong in a special place in someone's heart reassures me that I am worth something to this world.

That feeling in a way inspired Ken to be who he is today. But as they say, true love can only be found once. So, Ken is more or less in a rather hmm...How to put it...Ish, fucked up situation now that he has lost that place in that someone's heart.

Ken has no goals in life, neither does he have an ambition. But certainly he would not blow his future away as he did with some of the missed opportunities that came his way coz' Ken knows that there are more things in life worth living for. Such as seeing the Sun rise, experiencing sky-diving, going scuba-diving, swim with the dolphins, and enjoying the country life.

Ken's studies now has basically gone down the drain despite a tremendous rise in grades the previous term. Why? Coz' he has lost that inspiration and driving force which keeps him going. More or less like a car with no engine and a plane with no wings. Ken used to study together with his best friend cum girlfriend but now, he is no longer able to as she has moved away from his life and all there's left is a shadow of the past. T_T



How come Ken manages to know quite a number of people of the opposite sex despite not being a person of many words? And yeah, how come he always tend to be with a different gal or at times portray himself like a ****?

Well, honestly, I am attracted to the opposite sex, which means I'm definitely not a homo. *coughs* *coughs* Unlike a few certain people that I know. *coughs* *coughs*

Anyways, yes, it may appeal to you that I know a significant number of gals but somehow I don't know how does it occur to you that I am able to stay in contact with each and every single one of them.

I used to have a girlfriend, yes, and whatsoever the rough times I've gone through to focus on one gal, heck I'd have to say was worth it. And yeah, it doesn't seem to appeal to you that many of the gals I know are already happily "married" and yes, they never would want to be nothing more than friends with me. Simple as that. And yes, bout' that "married" part, don't ask me. Coz' I don't know why I seem to know so many gals whom already have a boyfriend.

Sighs, I've got like what, 5 gal friends whom are already hooked with someone else, and it rather seems that they are the ones whom tend to message me to check up on me. How saddening ain't it? Elaine, Sam, Gaby, Sheryl. Ish, semua pun dah kahwin, but they're the ones who message me sometimes daily or at least few days once just to know how I'm doing.

The rest certainly I could tell that they would never want to be part of my life, and yeah, just my friends I guess. No offence eh, but I'm sure that's the way you feel bout' me rite?



And yeah, if Ken says his life is sucky, why does he have so many people to hang out with?

It could appeal to you that Ken is a person of influence, and I do not ever doubt that. But Ken in a way, has people whom not really be there for him as a friend, they're just there to be there. Stick-ifying to Ken is a good thing, coz' you'll learn lotsa new stuff and lotsa funny stuff about life, but then when the sincerity isn't there, Ken doesn't really appreciate your presence.

You stick to Ken coz' you ain't got anybody to stick to. You pretend to care bout' Ken so that Ken will think that you're always around him coz' you care about him. The hoax and the deception, sighs.

Ken's word of advice : "Get a life, and stop leeching off of Ken coz' Ken is cool and you can never be like Ken no matter what you do or how much you try to copy whatever he does".



Why is Ken sometimes ignorant and acting like a real biatch?

Ken is ignorant at times, yes, but Ken is never a biatch. He may seem to you as one, but yet again, it is you to judge.

Ken is willing to give anything to whom he thinks is his friend, all you need is just to ask, or just to smile to let him know that he ain't the only one who actually cares.

Ken is always unprepared to initiate first moves, but he is still learning. Even his past relationship was started off by the gal. Yes, an opprobrium it may sound to you, but hey, Ken doesn't care, coz' he is proud of what he has achieved through that relationship.

And yeah, Ken seldom shows his soft side and his compassionate side, other than when *coughs* dating *coughs* (but only one gal has come to see that side of me), and when sacrificing himself for the sake of something more important, or when he opens himself to other people.

So, yes, Ken too has a soft spot in him. Everyone does, just that it takes the right moment and the right person to unlock it.

So never think that Ken is a selfish prick, coz' the more you think he doesn't care, the more he tends to surprise you with his care and appreciation towards you.

And yes, Ken notices many things that others fail to notice or see in people. But Ken is a rather secretive person, but deep down, he knows the puzzle that's going on inside.



These are just some stuff about Ken to let you know some stuff about him. So, never be judgemental towards Ken, he hates it. Never be ignorant towards Ken, he hates it even more. Never wear a mask when facing Ken, he hates that too. And never ever break Ken's heart, he'll never forgive you for the rest of his life.

" A true friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out ".

Those words somehow relates to the theory I stated in the post "Circle of Life".
And yes, being that true friend makes Ken a happy person, coz' he knows that there is someone who is gonna be there.

And yeah, simple thoughts really make Ken's day. A simple greeting or a good night wish, or something, it is significant enough to mean something.

Just like this one here, I'm not gonna say who sent it to me, but if you're reading, you'll know who you are :


" Remember to remember me. Forget of forgetting me. Even if you try to remember to forget me, I will never forget to remember to remind you to remember me ! Thanks for being a great friend to me..."

That really enlightened me, thanks again =)


I guess that's all about this post and Ken, well, don't be bothered by that message, coz' Ken knows how much he means to some people as they are to him. So, never assume Ken as who he is, coz' deep down, he can melt your heart and break it, but he can also mend your soul and heal it or give it life again. Aites, nites people.

And lastly, thanks a whole damn lot for reading. Really appreciate it. =)