The Way You Make Me Feel

Ken

I came across something interesting lately, and it really made me laugh hard.

Chuck Norris Facts-


Chuck Norris can speak Braille.

If you have $5, and Chuck Norris has $5, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

Chuck Norris doesn't have a Ctrl button on his keyboard because Chuck Norris is always in control.

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep... He waits.

If you ever ask yourself a question, the best possible answer would be Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris took a big ball of crap and made them into planets.

Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on dry land.

God said, "Let there be light". Chuck Norris said, "Say please".

Chuck Norris can divide by zeros.

Chuck Norris visited The Virgin Islands once, it is now known as The Islands.

Chuck Norris has friends on MySpace that doesn't even have a MySpace.

Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't pushing himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris once shot down a German airplane by pointing at it and yelling "Bang!".

First rule about Chuck Norris: Don't talk about Chuck Norris.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris once roundhouse-kicked a salesman, over the phone.

Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in three moves.

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

The Bible was originally titled 'Chuck Norris & Friends'.

Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are now known as giraffes.

When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can judge a book by its cover.

If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.

In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner is Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch, he decides what time it is.

Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.

Only Chuck Norris can prevent forest fires.

Chuck Norris can cook minute rice, in 30seconds.

Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark, the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

Iraq doesn't have weapons of mass destruction, because Chuck Norris lives in America.

Chuck Norris knows Victoria's Secret.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris once killed two stones with one bird.

Chuck Norris doesn't use spell check. If he misspells a word, Oxford simply changes the actual spelling of it.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep at night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

Outer space exists because it didn't want to live on the same planet as Chuck Norris.

The government tried to mimic Chuck Norris' roundhouse-kick, but they only got nuclear bombs, they weren't even close.

Chuck Norris doesn't dodge bullets, the bullets dodge Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can solve a rubics cube by staring at it.

God was named 'God' because the name 'Chuck Norris' was already taken.

Chuck Norris can drown a fish.

Chuck Norris makes onions cry.

On Chuck Norris' calendar, it goes from 31st March to 2nd April because nobody fools Chuck Norris.

If you Google "Chuck Norris gets his ass kicked", your computer will explode.

There are no disabled people, only people who met Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris scared the black out of Michael Jackson.

Chuck Norris can squeeze orange juice out of bananas.

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

We only live because Chuck Norris lets us.

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Hope you had a laugh. =D



*Little wonders. <3