Wednesday, June 6, 2007

EmpTy

If you're reading for today's update, please start with the 6/6 post. Thanks.

I've been thinking today, when I got home.
Who is Justin Low? Who is this guy? Does anyone really know him?
As in who he really is, what's his hobby, who is he like, what interests him, what he is really like.

Hmm...Yea, I've been thinking that, and guess what.
I've realized that nobody knows, honestly, nobody. Well, currently nobody lor.
Before she left, she truly knew me, she truly understood me, we were close, really close.
She knew what pleased me at times where I needed someone to comfort me, when I needed someone to talk to, or maybe just someone to be there for me, and make me feel that I'm not alone.

Well, there is someone else la, I mean that knows me quite well, but now he's not really close with me, and so, we're not that close anymore. Sighs...Well, actually, he knew a lot about me, seriously, my attitude, my actions, my feelings, he knew. Haha, yea, he was something like my best friend. We spent a lot of time together, talking, gossiping ( yes, GOSSIP~! ), joking around, telling each other our problems, stoning, vandalizing, and causing chaos. Haha, it was fun while it lasted, but now, it's gone la, but I accept that, coz' that could be partially my fault too in some way.

Anyways, I miss the times la basicly, those times where I wasn't lonely, and when somebody really really really knew who I am. The emptiness that fills me now really just makes me feel like I don't know, as if I'm alone la. Nobody knows me, nobody understands la. Sighs...

I know I know...I shouldn't be emo again la. But I mean I can't help it la, I came back, and I thought of this, and really, I don't know what to say la. She used to be the one that could really tell me for who I am, and really understood me for what I was goin through. Omg, too much info I guess, lol. Qwer...

Though I do know that those times cannot be brought back, but yet, I do know for sure, that those times were the times that I could really depend on someone. Now, too often have I questioned the sincerity of the people around me, the trust just isn't there like how I trusted her. Maybe it's my fault for being too open to her and not anyone else, or maybe it's meant to be like this, or maybe it's just...Just....

eMo !

1 comment:

Mei Hsuan, Chen said...

Hey didn't know you have a blog too . Somehow, just stumbled upon yours. Lols .

Anyway, go on with life. Leave the past as memories! :)